Heart Broken
61One-sided Love?
Just a while ago I read someone's blog, someone who was heart broken and thought that his life has ended. Let me ask you all one question? If we're capable of doing so many things, at the end why does love ruin everything for us? Why do emotions come in our way and block everything for us? Why is love blind? Can we mix career, success, money and love altogether? We wish!
In this case there's alot of questions, but many little answers. Why is that? Love is probably the most complicated but the most simplist feeling in the world next to trust. We love because we trust, we trust because we love, it's that simple or is it that confusing? Bottom line is, good or bad, we have to move on at some point. We cannot keep blaming someone for our behaviour, life does not stop and especially your heart doesn't stop. Your going to fall in love again and you're going to fall again but nobody is going to come and pick us up. Every body is responsible for their own actions and every one will get back for what they did.
Life is hard but learn to challenge it, become good at winning not whining. I ofcourse fell in love and those were the greatest days of my life but every up has a fall to it. I had lost him and it was very painful, couldn't stop crying for many days, stoped eating, got disturbed but realized soon that why am I waisting my tears over the person who has left me and doesn't even care. Why should I torture myself? After that I became stronger and believed that even though everybody needs someone, every person is itself their own healer. Nobody can help you but you.
So put your tears and emotions into good use and help others. Nothing beats the pain then healing other people's pains yourself. I like to see my self happy and I can only do that If I see others happy. So that makes the statement correct of everyone needs somebody because after all we do need somebody, whether it's a partner, spouse, a friend, a child and it all falls down into the category of trust and love. That's because next to God is love and trust.
Feel free to advise on anything I missed out.
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Thank you for your comment Amy, It's just sad these days people don't realize that there's so many help needed such as children being abused, women being harrassed, homeless people, people who lost their loved ones, they all need our help. I am sure when people realize that there's more problems in the world, there problems seem to be much smaller then what they have to them.
I did not know you have gone through so much. I should have read this hub a long way back. I respect you even more now.
Well, I only really started writing just yesterday (thanks to someone), so you couldn't of seen it long way back. But thanks, I guess we now have more respect for each other then ever.
Hey. I thought you had written these hubs sometime back. Anyway, I agree on the respect thing. Still, I know you will hit me with a baseball club whenever I come in front of you because of these two days :-)
oh how did you know!! you're good!
Hello.
I´m new at hubs, too. I´ve come accross your hubs just by chance (ok, nothing happens by chance, I know, but c´mon, this is internet - the place where not everything means so much :-) ,and I must confess that your picture attracted my attention (can´t help it - it´s the same with anything spectatular, God made me this way), and I said to myself: Do models write hubs too? Fine, it´s not that bad with this world then. Next, I liked your tag words, then started reading... Anyway, i think your way of getting through these strong emotions of a relationship matter is good and the right one - everybody must be strong and realize there are much bigger, real problems, and it happens to everybody, this falling in love with no happy end, so why concentrate too much on oneself? It can always be no other way than just pretty painful, of course, but we are not the only feeling humans in this world, and mustn´t dwell in our sadness, self-pity, or disappointment, it wouldn´t help. it´s time to go on. When I was younger I fell in love and was rejected several times but though it was unpleasant, I never ceased to believe it can give me something. And moreover, if something doesn´t happen as we wish, there´s probably a good reason and we have no idea whether it would not turn out well for us at last! For example, I am now happy that none of those relations flourished, ´cause I am very satisfied to have my present family. And even if i wasn´t, one must be strong and accept reality - what else is it to do with?
Wish you good luck in any realtionship!
Mike
Didn't you have another picture of you having a blanket over your head in the bed? Any way, you made me blush by your compliments but no, I'm not a model but thank you. I really love what you said about if you weren't satisfied, you would have to be strong and accept reality, that was my main point!! Well worded. I couldnt've said it better. If you really look at it, life is not that bad, it's just us that make it worse for others and ourselves. Life is only going by it's rule. It's just doing whatever it's supposed to do. It has it's ups and downs but the main point is that it's equal, if today your miserable, tommorrow it's a new day again. But because we keep in memory the bad moments more then the good ones, for that reason we think that life is playing with us. The bottom line is that we have to learn to move on and accept the reality of life and once we do, we start to see the glass half full!!!!
Definitely! You have got such a clear vision of life and reality, such full, complete practical philosophy it takes me by surprise (a big and pleasant one). You put it right again - maybe there could be another hub based on your commentary, e.g. like we take notice of & remember more bad moments. I have been thinking of writing a short story covering the subject. An ancient thing, yes, but still, people keep complaining over and over. Somebody might object then that there are a lot of really miserable events and guys suffering so much it´s hard to imagine more pain... but let better everybody walk in their shoes and see their own situation clearly because no one can walk in anybody else´s to be competent to judge. A matter of the existence of evil in our world is another discussion anyway. Just think about the hub on everyday REALISTIC attitude and how you manage to keep it. Others find it OPTIMISTIC perhaps, not realistic, but as we already agreed, people tend to be biased. Of course life is not that bad. It was created by Him, the love itself.
Oh wow, yeah I was thinking about writing another hub based on people's attitude towards life but I haven't had enough time since I have college work to do and today I am loaded with work but I'll surely think about that. And that's very correct that no one can walk in any bodies shoes, they can't but they should feel the other person's pain and misery and do something about it. They should be able to forget their own misery and pain and try helping others that are in their worse situation once a while. You have made great points, I guess you should be the one writing related hubs since you have way of words and I'm sure people would be inspired by your words. Very interesting personality I can say the least!!!
THESE ARE INSPIRING WORDS, HELPING OTHERS DO MAKE YOU FEEL GREAT. PEOPLE SHOULD LEARN THAT WHEN SOMEONE LET YOU DOWN OR HURT YOU, YOU ONLY BECOME STRONGER, AND YOU'RE MORE CAPABLE TO FACE THE NEXT CHALLENGE OR OBSTACLE. I REALLY ADMIRE WHAT YOU WROTE.
Aeman, thanks for such a nice respond! You completed what I meant - the proverb with else´s shoes. Yes, sure, there should be a valve to that attitude that let inside others´ feelings to care about them - simply, empathy principle - but keeps away judgements - just because even if we try to undestand others´ feeling, we can´t be them and feel everything like them. I was just maybe overthinking that when you express in your writing life is not just awful if one doesn´t concentrate on the bad moments, some may reply ´Oh really?? Look at those people affected by a hurricane or suffering from cancer´. Cause I´ve come accross such discussions - people pull out the extremes to support their opinion. But if they want to be honest they should look at their own situation and daily reactions, attitudes, etc. at first. When they do it, they run a risk of becoming optimists (I mean realists :-) Nobody denies there are big tragedies and real pain in life, but as C.S. Lewis put it in one of Narnia novels, ´It´s their story. You know only your story´ (rough quote). It says nothing of ´Don´t care about their needs´!
Oh, and now it reminds me also of a phrase from The Move´s old song Chinatown. It is "DANCING in my shoes". Now that´s the attitude I´d like to adopt!
I´m also thankful for your encouragement. I suppose I will write also hubs not connected directly to music in future. (Just don´t know when - I have busy days now, as you do.) Good luck with your college work!
great hub. I am heartbroken over a divorce and loss of step child and they are moving to another country never to be seen again. I am hanging in there. I never thought I could
Heart Broken, the experience is painful and heart breakening. But when do we get over it, since when do we know that it's not going to happen again?
When a baby falls down, it starts crying till someone picks him/her up and gives love and security of you being there for him/her no matter what, but when adults fall down, most of the time, there's no one to pick you up because they know that you can manage yourself. They know that you can help yourself now and you should be believeing in yourself that you know that you're giong to be okay.
Life is a cycle, people are born and are dead, people laugh and cry. But we should always have is hope in our hearts, hope for a light at the end of the tunnel. Broken heart is unfixable but is repairable. Today you have nothing to give and take, but the two days that we have left of our lives, it's enough to share the love we have within us and see life through someone else's eyes.
Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.
You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe deserve your love and affection.
Buddha
I take issue with anyone who is willing to end their life over a ruined love affair. I'm not trying to be mean, but there has to be something missing inside of someone if they're willing to throw their life away over a partner who isn't reciprocating their feelings. I appreciate everyone's comments on commiting ourselves to helping others when something has gone so terribly wrong in our own lives that it looks that bleak. I think changing the focus onto others is a wonderful idea, but if you really are seriously contemplating commiting suicide or if things just seem so awful you don't even want to get out of bed for more than a few days it's time to seek out professional help.
One thing I've learned about love and relationships is that both should never stagnate or stale. Love is indeed complicated and yet simple. Love is a continuously evolving feeling and most of the time it involves changes in our ways, perceptions, patience, tolerance and everything else that defines our individuality. That is where the complications come in. Conflicts arises when we still think of ourselves as individuals in a relationship. That is why sacrifice is the greatest love of all. In love, we give up ourselves and merge with another person thus creating an individual of two persons! Can you just imagine the possible scenarios for conflicts and resistance to rear it's ugly head? It's never easy, really. Unless both parties learn to accept that their happiness and contentment lies in the happiness and contentment of the other, love will more than likely die a natural death.
My heart has broken, Aeman, and nothing seems to fix it. I feel sometimes as if it is going to burst with pain, but I just keep moving on. I find that by channeling the pain into something else, I am able to cope much better. I am hoping that my writing will help. It seems too. Thank you for a great hub... Much success.....
Great advice and a great hub!
I enjoyed reading your hub because my heart was broken a few weeks ago and I felt like it was the end of the world but thanks to my friends picking me up as I was falling I'm back to being my old self again but looking for love anytime soon is on the back burner for me..I found your hub very inspiring and will continue to read more.
Love does not ruin..Ego ruins everything.
Lovely I like it very nice
amy jane Level 1 Commenter 4 years ago
I agree - helping others is a wonderful way to change your focus and feel positive even when you are broken hearted.